The Worst Dialogue ever made for Nurses

In my time as an English teacher in Japan, I had accomplished very little until now.
I wrote the below dialogue as part of the listening section for a final exam of a class I taught to nursing students. It was full of the important terms we had learned over the semester such as bowel movements, acute pain and diarrhea. After writing the dialogue, I attempted to record it with a friend of mine. I played the nurse and he played himself, Mr. B. As is apparent in the recording, we said the dialogue with straight faces until Mr. B shared his diarrhea problem with me. After that, I realized how bizarre the dialogue was and we both could not say it without laughing. After over 100 tries and two hours we were finally able to act the dialogue from beginning to end without laughing. I saved all 100 of our attempts for posterity and decided to put some of our funnier blunders on the internet. Please click here to listen or press "play" below. I also challenge anyone to try to say this with a buddy and keep a straight face.

Mr. B hurries to the hospital; it is an emergency
Mr. B: Help me.
Nurse: What seems to be your problem?
Mr. B: I have a terrible pain in my stomach!
Nurse: Could you describe the pain?
Mr. B: It’s an acute pain!
Nurse: How long have you had the pain?
Mr. B: For about two hours!
Nurse: Have you taken your temperature?
Mr. B: No I haven’t.
Nurse: Ok. Let me take your temperature. It’s 38.9 degrees Celsius! You have a fever. How are your bowel habits?
Mr. B: I have diarrhea.
Nurse: I think that you might have the flu.

Note: I am current experimenting with embedding the sound files in the blog. Click play below and maybe you can listen to the above dialogue.

Honest Talk about Studying in America

Gami, who is in Illinois for a year, is writing about her experience studying at a US university on her blog. She has made some pretty interesting observations about the differences between Japanese and US universities. Keep us posted Gami!

The Difference Between Thai and Japanese Middle/ High Schools

(To the left is an English class in Thailand taught by Japanese teachers.)
Today Eri, Ayu and I had an interesting talk about the differences we observed between the middle school/upper school we visited in Ayutthaya and the middle schools we have taught at or been students at in Japan. Cube, who will be going to the school this month, also participated in the discussion. As Eri mentioned in her blog, it is hard to tell for certain what the differences are because we were only in Thailand for a brief time and only saw one school. So this post will be about the differences we observed.

1. Both Ayu and Eri mentioned that when they studied English in Japan, their teachers focused on vocabulary and grammar. Ayu said she felt the Thai students were a little more fluent because they spent their time in class practicing and learning phrases. Eri said that the school she observed tended to focus more on listening and speaking than in Japan.
2. Eri mentioned that in the Thai classroom the teacher stood closer to the students. In the Japanese classroom the teacher stands on a podium and is farther away from the students.
3. Another big difference was that at the school in Ayutthaya, the teachers made their own materials. In the Japanese classroom, teachers tend to use a textbook.
4. Japanese students are required to have textbooks. In the school we visited students were not required to have textbooks and quite often the teachers provided the material.
5. In the Japanese English classroom it is more difficult to call on a student. Let me give an example: I ask a student in class "How is the weather?". The student mumbles something I cannot understand. So, I ask "Excuse me, can you say that again?" The student looks embarrassed and freezes. He asks his friends what he should do. His friends tell him to say the phrase again. He hesitates to speak. His friends encourage him more and eventually he says the phrase again. Even if I still do not understand him, I will pretend that I do because I do not want to waste any more time. When I taught in Thailand, I asked a student a question. She answered, but I did not understand her. I asked her to repeat what she said in a louder voice. She repeated what she said without hesitation and I understood her.
6. At the school in Thailand, all students in all classes had to do an independent project. In Japan, there tends to be less project work and more test-taking.
7. In Japan classes usually start on time and there are very few changes to the schedule. In Thailand, the schedule seemed to change quite often. So classes quite often did not start on time. I actually found the unpredictability kind of exciting.
8. In the Japanese classroom, the desks are usually aligned in (close to) perfect rows. In Thailand, the desks were not aligned in perfect rows.
9. In Thailand, the students had to take off their shoes before entering their classroom. Teachers, though, did not have to take off their shoes. In Japan, students wear "indoor shoes" when they are in their classrooms and leave their "outdoor shoes" in a locker in the front hall of the school building.
10. According to a Thai colleague of mine the goals of the national English curriculum are the following:

1) Communication: Students have to improve their four skills.
2) Connection: English should be connected with other subjects such as technology, history etc.
3) Community: students have to use English inside and outside the school
4) Culture: Students have to be able to understand about the culture of the other countries.

I believe that the national curriculum for English education in Japan has goals similar to 1) and 4) and perhaps 2) also. To my knowledge, they do not have a goal similar to 3). At the school in Ayutthaya, was that teachers had the freedom to design their own syllabus and create their own materials to accomplish these goals. In Japan, teachers do not have as much flexibility. Quite often a textbook will be chosen for a teacher by his department or school.

The above are the subjective observations of Ayu, Eri and myself and should not be taken as fact. If you would like to add something to the above or correct something, please write a comment!